Thursday, March 3, 2011

The Road to Here

I tend to believe everything is exactly as it should be, even if it’s not exactly the way I’d want it to be. But if someone had asked me 15 years ago if I’d be more likely at the age of 33 to
a)      have 6 kids or
b)      have no kids
I would have guessed I’d be the happy mother to half a dozen children by now. That is a young mind for you, nary a clue how life might unfold.
Early warning signs of trouble ahead included a longer than normal cycle (30 to 40 days), painful periods and spotting before, after and sometimes in between periods. It’s not like I didn’t ask doctors if these things were normal. I did. The typical response was a random blood test and a recommendation to try the Pill, which I always declined to do.
There were also the Natural Family Planning (Creighton Model) classes John and I took before getting married. The instructor said my temperature charts were just too unpredictable, so she advised I rely on my cervical mucus instead to avoid or achieve pregnancy. That should have been a red flag.
In fairness, not all the doctors have been oblivious. One, a few years ago, ran a ton of tests and then told me my hormone levels weren’t ideal. No worries. I was certain my hormones weren't any worse than a crack addicts and they get pregnant all the time. Other doctors have suggested Clomid, which seems extreme without a diagnosis and at least trying holistic options first.
That said getting pregnant naturally is no piece of cake. (Mmm, cake. Did I mention needing to eliminate junk carbs, kick my Excedrin addiction and lose weight?) I’ll leave my disdain for making life changes for another post. For now, let me say I’m excited to have company on this journey, though I would not have thought making a baby would involve anyone other than me and my husband. 


  1. You ladies are great- thanks for sharing your stories. I'll be a regular reader!

  2. I know! It kills me that for some that you think have destroyed their reproductive tracts forever get pregnant so easily.

    And I miss carbs. Whole grain stuff just doesn't cut it.

  3. You guys make me smile. Because of this, I am gonna tell you something. I am 28 (29 in a month) years old and had a friggen breakdown in my obgyn's office. My husband and I have been married for two years. No babies on the horizon. I have incredibly painful periods. The dr. just did a test and it looks like I have some polyps and possibly endometriosis. I feel like... and this is stupid, that what the hell am I doing with fertility problems and womanly issues? I am black. All black women I know pop out babies like they breathe. Even my former best friend who had sex with an entire frat house, numerous abortions, numerous day after pills, got pregnant with her kids (after she got married of course *insert eye roll*) at the blink of an eye. I want to throttle my uterus.

  4. Oh, Leslie, I am so sorry! All I can say is you are not alone. Thank you for sharing.

  5. Thank you for sharing your stories, ladies. This take courage in no small amount!

  6. Christina - great post!! I think you and I may share a Mittelshmerz issue. Mmm, Mittelshmerz.

    Leslie - I can relate. My mother keeps telling me women in my family don't have problems getting pregnant! I really think you should read Making Babies. There is definitely hope for you.

  7. I was married very young, only 20, and got pregnant right away, about four months later. While pregnant, they discovered tumors on my ovaries, and weeks after the birth of my son, I had them, and one ovary, removed. They told me I wouldn't be able to get pregnant for "a year or so". Just a few short months later I got pregnant with my second son. About a year and a half later, I discovered I was pregnant again, despite being on the pill, but I miscarried my baby at around 13 weeks. It was devestating and horrify; what happens to your body when you miscarry. I struggled for a year to get pregnant. I finally did, almost exactly one year later, and delivered my third baby boy a few months ago. This long winded post is just to say - sometimes it easy to get knocked up, sometimes you have to work extra hard. Your stories speak to my heart, and I admire your bravery, honesty, and humor. We could all use a bit more of that. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

  8. Where are the cake photos? The only word I saw was cake.

    I thought this was a food blog. Missteps in the kitchen kind of thing.

    Someone help me. Please.

    In all seriousness, where's the cake?

  9. I'm sending you three brave women my prayers to St. Gerard. When we were discerning a second baby, I "randomly" received St. Gerard's prayer card and the next month I was pregnant. I don't believe in coincidences.

  10. I'm with John. All I heard was cake!

    Also, do you know if this author has written a book before the Making Babies one? Uhmm... like... Making a Cute Boy Kiss You and Tell You He Loves You kind of book?

    I'm on that part. I bet she'd still recommend losing weight in that one too. ;)

  11. Thank you for sharing your stories. I wish I had such a blog during the long five years it took me to get pregnant.

    My cycle was anywhere from 25 to 35 days. I had test after test and everything came back fine. Well, if everything was fine, why couldn't I get pregnant?!

    The only thing that finally worked for me was the Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor.

    After the first cycle of using the monitor I got pregnant. I miscarried, but I, at least, knew I could get pregnant. I had hope.

    I used the monitor the very next cycle and got pregnant again! I now have two beautiful daughters. If had had not used the Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor I don't know how long it would have taken me.

    I also prayed to St. Gerard. I have a metal I wore. Like EC, I also don't believe in coincidences.

    The three of you are in my prayers.

  12. C, I think you should swap your Excedrin habit for Vicks Nyquil. I'm sure John will support you on this one.

  13. a bunch of solid posts, ladies. keep up the good work.